Part 2!
If you didn't read part 1 (with questions involving Einstein, Robin Van Persie, talking spiders and out of tune pianos) go and read it here before you read part 2:
http://lifeisorganisedchaos.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/iaqs-infrequently-asked-questions-part-1.html
Anyway, so ready for more infrequently asked questions fresh from the mind's of my Facebook friends?
Slightly scared. Also having quickly glanced at the questions I feel I may need to revise my standard of friend. But let's get on with it.
Do bananas feel naked when we've peeled them?
Oh that's an easy one! I imagine when you peel a banana it's first thoughts would be something more along the lines of:
"OH GOD I'M GOING TO BE EATEN."
Or
"*gasp* I CAN BREATHE! FINALLY!"
Rather then:
"Hmm...I do feel rather exposed, I'm awfully embarrassed."
Like I said, easy question...next!
Do houses miss us when we're out?
Oh. Errr...I'm going to go with yes.
If I were a house (that's something I never thought i'd say) I think having somebody walking around doing things would at least be something to watch. I'd get so bored when nobody was in...just sitting there. Silently.
In fact the other day I got home and realised my house had been crying, and so it must of missed me! Case solved.
(EDIT: Turned out to be rain and a leaky roof, so case unsolved. Sorry.)
If you dropped a Delorean from the sky and it hit 88mph would it go to the centre of the earth?
No. I applaud you're 'Back to the Future reference but it pains me to say no for a couple of reasons. Firstly, you don't specify which Delorean...if this is just a regular car and not the 'Back to the Future' car...you'd simply end up with a mess. Secondly, if this was, indeed, the Delorean which can travel through time from the film series (which by the way was destroyed in the third film anyway) it can only travel in time, not space...so you'd still end up with a giant mess...only this time you'd have a very squished Doc Brown and Marty McFly inside.
Hmm...that was a depressing answer. I don't like that answer. I'm going to change my answer to yes. Just because it would be cooler.
Yes.
Does a television watch us when it's on?
*shudder*
That's a creepy thought.
But I can say no. No a TV does not watch us when it's on. That would be ridiculous.
A computer however...
And now before we all get involved in a dodgy poorly constructed webcam based horror film plot it's time to say goodbye.
If I didn't answer your question don't be offended or anything, I ended up picking at random...but if I get a few more anytime in the future I'll make sure to go back to answer some of the ones I missed too.
Now where else could you find a blog that includes the lines:
"if you peel a banana it's first thoughts would be"
"if I were a house"
and "a very squished Doc Brown"
all in one post?
*waves*
Thank you
Iain jb
Showing posts with label IAQs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label IAQs. Show all posts
Thursday, 3 January 2013
Tuesday, 1 January 2013
I.A.Q's (Infrequently Asked Questions) - Part 1
Ok. You know F.A.Q's?
Frequently asked questions will usually comprise of boring, sensible questions that people need to know the answers to.
That's just boring.
Hence, I asked people I know to ask me the most ridiculous, stupid, pointless questions they could think of so instead of having an F.A.Q's section I could have some all together pointless I.A.Q's (infrequently asked questions).
Unfortunately, I didn't really consider how strange people are...and so ended up with so many question I've had to split my answers to them down into 2 sections. Section 1 incoming. Deep breaths. Here we go.
If people could talk to spiders, do you still think they'd be scared of them?
Well, this very much depends on the voice spiders would have. In my head these spiders are all talking like super villains, mono-logging about how they are going to destroy the world...if that's how they'd speak...well it wouldn't do much to ease fears. However, what if these spiders are all speaking in squeaky high voices about how much they love ice cream and bouncy castles? Well that's a different matter. Next questi....wait, what? What do you mean I have to have an answer? Let's say yes. Because...well...yes.
Could I beat Robin Van Persie (Dutch football/soccer player) at swingball?
Yes. I was chatting to him earlier about swing-ball (as you do) and he was saying he's awful at it. So unless you don't have any arms you should be able to beat him at the very manly game of swing-ball Oh and play violently. I can think of nothing funnier than R.V.P having to go to training the next day and saying "Oh sorry, I got injured during a particularly aggressive game of the kids game swing-ball".
What was Albert Einsteins favourite disco tune? (Seriously where are people getting these questions from?)
I've never really had Einstein down as a disco guy...I believe he played the violin. Violins are high pitched...logical progression...he'd probably be a big fan of the Bee Gee's. A violin has four strings. Is there a Bee Gee's song with a four word title? YES! 'You Should Be Dancing' would have been Albert Einsteins favourite disco tune. Dance Albert dance. Pure logic there. Big Al would be proud.
Disclaimer: I very much doubt Einstein would be proud...more likely he'd give me a condescending look for referring to him as 'Big Al' and then put me in my place with a ridiculously clever put-down.
Have you ever broken your piggy bank in an incident involving an out of tune piano and a sausage dog? (Hey, I said 'INfrequently asked questions!'
No.
Although I did once break my piggy bank in an incident involving an out of tune piano and an under-cooked hot dog.
Right. That's section 1 out of the way. If you think you have some good answers to these questions please write these down and email them to me at iainboswell@gmail.com I'd like to see responses. Now if you'll excuse me I now have an image of a super villain spider with a twirly moustache in my head and I think I need a lie down.
Thank you
Iain jb
PART 2: http://lifeisorganisedchaos.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/iaqs-infrequently-asked-questions-part-2.html
Frequently asked questions will usually comprise of boring, sensible questions that people need to know the answers to.
That's just boring.
Hence, I asked people I know to ask me the most ridiculous, stupid, pointless questions they could think of so instead of having an F.A.Q's section I could have some all together pointless I.A.Q's (infrequently asked questions).
Unfortunately, I didn't really consider how strange people are...and so ended up with so many question I've had to split my answers to them down into 2 sections. Section 1 incoming. Deep breaths. Here we go.
If people could talk to spiders, do you still think they'd be scared of them?
Well, this very much depends on the voice spiders would have. In my head these spiders are all talking like super villains, mono-logging about how they are going to destroy the world...if that's how they'd speak...well it wouldn't do much to ease fears. However, what if these spiders are all speaking in squeaky high voices about how much they love ice cream and bouncy castles? Well that's a different matter. Next questi....wait, what? What do you mean I have to have an answer? Let's say yes. Because...well...yes.
Could I beat Robin Van Persie (Dutch football/soccer player) at swingball?
Yes. I was chatting to him earlier about swing-ball (as you do) and he was saying he's awful at it. So unless you don't have any arms you should be able to beat him at the very manly game of swing-ball Oh and play violently. I can think of nothing funnier than R.V.P having to go to training the next day and saying "Oh sorry, I got injured during a particularly aggressive game of the kids game swing-ball".
What was Albert Einsteins favourite disco tune? (Seriously where are people getting these questions from?)
I've never really had Einstein down as a disco guy...I believe he played the violin. Violins are high pitched...logical progression...he'd probably be a big fan of the Bee Gee's. A violin has four strings. Is there a Bee Gee's song with a four word title? YES! 'You Should Be Dancing' would have been Albert Einsteins favourite disco tune. Dance Albert dance. Pure logic there. Big Al would be proud.
Disclaimer: I very much doubt Einstein would be proud...more likely he'd give me a condescending look for referring to him as 'Big Al' and then put me in my place with a ridiculously clever put-down.
Have you ever broken your piggy bank in an incident involving an out of tune piano and a sausage dog? (Hey, I said 'INfrequently asked questions!'
No.
Although I did once break my piggy bank in an incident involving an out of tune piano and an under-cooked hot dog.
Right. That's section 1 out of the way. If you think you have some good answers to these questions please write these down and email them to me at iainboswell@gmail.com I'd like to see responses. Now if you'll excuse me I now have an image of a super villain spider with a twirly moustache in my head and I think I need a lie down.
Thank you
Iain jb
PART 2: http://lifeisorganisedchaos.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/iaqs-infrequently-asked-questions-part-2.html
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